The eBook Zone Mind is out Now! Learn more...

The eBookZone Mind is Out! Learn More...

Saturday, January 11, 2014

Conquering the Fear of Change

I can’t deny that the holidays were a source of reflection and an opportunity for me to reassess my priorities in life. I don’t believe in new year resolutions because I feel from experience, I rarely kept them for longer than a week and then returned to my old ways. 

Even if the year itself has only meaning within human societies, new year’s was just like any other day before or after it. Having said that,I think that the holiday season leading to new year’s day offer us a chance of real change and renewal. I feel that 2014 is a year where I will work to address the things that keep me chained to my past and get back in control over my life and work.

I am being vague. I know, but it would be premature to announce anything to the world before I’m sure of my decision.

For sure, I may need to change many of the priorities I had in the years prior to 2014 and perhaps devote more time to a new way of doing activism. I may need to rethink how I want to live in life and to be clearer about my values and ethics as an individual. I embark into 2014 with some satisfaction I had when I finally self-published my eBook “Zone Mind”. Yet, my initial joy didn’t last long as I didn’t know whether to promote this work or not. If it was really shallow and against the spirit for which I have started this blog ZoneMind in the first place. 

I feared that I wasn’t being authentic once again. That the desire for attention caught me into its delusive grip. Once again.

That, perhaps, I still believed I was better than the rest when I was not. A feeling of emptiness when you realise that the life you thought conquered is still there, active on an unconscious level that becomes comes back to haunt me.

I want to change but I fear change. I want to follow what my heart and mind are telling me but I am still clinging to a comfort zone that prevents me from taking the next step.

 The risk is that in staying in my current position will continue to cause me dissatisfaction and, whether we want it or not, reality will catch up with us without usbeing prepared.

 One day, my life will end. The current concerns that haunt me today will seem absurd and a waste of useless worry. We are nothing In this universe but we must be responsible for our own futures.

I must take that responsibility even if change can be painful and yet, essential for me to grow.

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